Our Mom, June P. Miller, was something special! I think she wasn't aware of how special she was to us and others. June (nee' Scholnick) Miller was the epitome of "live, laugh, love"!
In the years between her birth, October 20th, 1922 raised in Mattapan, Massachusetts and her passing, October 28th, 2008, in University City, Missouri, she lived a very full circle of life!
As she began high school, her family moved to Brookline, Massachusetts. Here's one of June Scholnick's notes to her teacher in high school:
April 3, 1940
Dear Mr. Holland:
My biology book is in my locker. My home lessons is in my biology
book.
I am in room 323 and my locker is near room 309. Since my book
is not with me and I cannot be with my book, my home lesson cannot
be with you.
Most Sincerely
June
Scholnick
I can't remember if she got out of being in trouble for the homework or not.
The story of how our parents met is our father, Boris Miller, while he was a student at MIT and working as a telephone operator in a doctor's office, a co-worker, Sally, gave him the name and phone number of our 18 yr old mother, June Scholnick, from some relative of hers. Well, when he called her up, and she asked him where he got her phone number, she didn't recognize the Aunt's name, and hung up on him. He persevered, finding out it wasn't her relative, but an in-law's relative. They talked for almost a year, getting to know each other, before they went on a date!
While our father was shipped overseas during WWll, our mom & her best friend from high school, Shirley Carson, left together to volunteer in May 1945 on a farm in North Conway, New Hampshire as part of the Womens' Land Army, wanting to help the war effort while the men were away. What an adventure!
Upon greeting these two young women, the crop farmer, Guy Smith, scratched his head as to how these two small, scrawny, females were going to work out! But they did and won the farmer over with their efforts! It was quite an experience and while it was very different from what they were accustomed to, they had the time of their lives, working hard, distracting themselves from missing their husbands.
These two best friends, Mom & Shirley, made a pact that no matter what, if one of them needed to go to the outhouse during the night, they would both hold hands and go together. Well, these two newlywed girlfriends had a spat one day over who was missing their husbands more, and even though they weren't speaking to each other, when Shirley nudged June during the night needing the bathroom, they held hands, still not speaking and found their way to the outhouse!
Finally, after WWll ended, our parents came to settle in University City, a suburb of St. Louis, Missouri, because of our Dad's new found job. Our parents lived in their home for more than 50 years, raising 2 sons and 2 daughters, making lifelong, countless friends of neighbors and more, while actively supporting and participating in many organizations to improve their community and country. Our Mom loved to write poetry and you could find her writings on various pieces of papers, everywhere, when thoughts came to mind. Her favorite poet was Edna St. Vincent Millay. As a teenager, her father surprised her by framing and hanging up a poem she had written and submitted to a magazine, printed under the alias of "Sarah Bernhardt"!
Our Mom loved to dance, from swing to belly dancing, and she was good! She was just so much fun, like a party! You could find her dancing in the kitchen, the living room, at weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, with her daughters, her grandsons, always with joy! "Since You've Come Along I Could Build a Moon" was a song written and composed by June Scholnick, rest assured, was for her beau, Boris! She enjoyed Ella Fitzgerald, Tommy Dorsey, Frank Sinatra, Doris Day and more! One time her father took her to see the Eddie Cantor Radio Show and she got to sit on the stage!
The experimental and non-traditional Goddard College in Vermont was where our Mom was a talented student and an aspiring stage actress. She enjoyed participating in summer stock in New Hampshire, playing various characters of all ages! Although, she gave up her career stage dreams to marry our father, her love of acting and improvisation led her to direct a play in a drama class at Temple Israel Sunday School, another play with my Girl Scout troop, and opportunities to act & improvisation through the organization, OASIS in University City!
Our parents were big readers of all kinds and kept up on current events, always trying to learn new words and use them in sentences. For a long time, every morning, one of our Mom's oldest and dearest friends, Marion Wice, would call her up and give her the "Word of the Day" word game. Our Mom would fill notebooks up, trying to come up with legitimate combinations using the letters from the word! She was very good at this game, like she was at "Scrabble"! Obviously, whether it was "Charades", "Trivia", "Encore", or "Password", our Mom was in her element!
Volunteerism and activism was a big part of her life, as she so admired Eleanor Roosevelt, she stood up for fairness. "Congress of Racial Equality", "Commission on Human Relations of University City", "League of Women Voters", and University City Residential Service (later becoming the Director) are just a few from a long list of our Mom's passions. She was even recognized by the University City Chamber of Commerce as an outstanding citizen!
Our parents loved to sing together, from morning till nite! Music was an important element of their life together. They enjoyed each other's company, loving, openly affectionate, respectful and protective. Among family and friends, their love was a joy to behold. Growing up, our mother cooked up healthy, well-rounded, and colorful meals, dinner always at 6pm! Delicious Friday night Sabbath dinners, Sunday special large meals for after Sunday School, as well as American and Jewish holidays, all laid out on a beautiful table, shared with friends. What great memories! Our Mom was normally not a clothes shopper, but sometimes she would find some "gems" from a thrift shop nearby that supported the blind. When we were young, she would bring us to the "Goodwill" to pick out books and records. Later, when I was married, she scoured the thrift shops for unique, beautiful tea saucers for my tea lovin' husband, Rasool! She wrote a wonderful (unfortunately unpublished ) children's book, "The Fish Story", about a boy, Lao Li in Peking, China and a giant carp! This book would lend itself well to beautiful illustrations and at the end, you're kept guessing what happened!
Our Mom loved ice cream, especially hot fudge sundaes with the works! She one time told me it's worth it to spend the extra money and get the pint of "Ben & Jerry"s Coffee Almond Fudge! My friend, Moujan, and I try to honor my Mom any chance we get! Her friend from middle school, Ruth Peterkin, noted, "With June there is no hiding, no deception-just an embracing of humanity. "Good listener", "open minded and compassionate","always appreciative of whatever anyone did for her", "rejoiced in others' experiences, trips and accomplishments", "June had a ready smile, an ability to laugh at her own foibles", "she appreciated the beauty in trees, flowers.... she really looked at the sky and clouds", "kept a secret", "gave good advice", "June represented the best of the social commitment that I'd thought was gone from America", are all quotes by family and friends of our Mom, June Miller.
One of our Mom's many sayings was, "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything"....which she was pretty good at following! Her enemies were prejudice, injustice and intolerance. Another one was, "you catch more bees with honey", and maybe one we could all take note of, "it's not what you say, it's how you say it". She took a lot of disappointments in this life, but she never complained, she accepted them and moved on. Dad was diagnosed around age 50 with muscular dystrophy, but that didn't stop the both of them. Ruth Peterkin wrote about our Mom, "No matter how hard times may get she knows how to roll with the punches and see the best in life. A good book, a good friend or a good joke. She's warm and caring; she's a real humanist, works at a friendship and is above all-a romantic".
Our Mom joined a program to study the effect of exercise on bone density in March 1992 at age 70, where she met and became a friend with Norma, a good Catholic. Norma and St. Anthony helped Mom find her keys once, when she had lost them in her house, under the pillow on the couch! They all became lifelong friends! Around the same time, also was diagnosed with CLL (Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia) which she battled for more than 16 years, but never changed her sense of well-being or joy of life. Irene, her daughter-in-law, who was in a wheelchair, was amazed at our Mom's physical strength (5ft 100lbs) & vitality, this "Itty-bitty" woman with a Barbie Doll figure, could push her chair all around everywhere and then hoist it into the trunk of her car!
June was resilient. The last 3 years were tough ones for our Dad, but you could always count on our Mom greeting him, whether in the hospital or home, with her hat tilted just so, a big smile, make-up, nicely dressed and accessorized! She would rattle off dates of exams, surgeries, medications of his with no problem. Because of our Mom, nurses and other hospital workers would always linger in our Dad's room. They were a forever love. Married and in love for 64 years! She always said it was just pure luck. Our mom had such great courage and strength. One time she gave an impromptu hoyer lift in-service to nurses caring for our Dad in the hospital, having had to acquire that skill herself for his home care. She amazed me with her determination to take care of her husband, that if they, the nurses aids could do it, she could, too!
A year before she passed away, at the age of 85, our Mom went to NYC to partake in a writing workshop as a guest of her middle school friend, Ruth Peterkin, sponsored by "The International Women's Writing Guild" at their 54th Bi-Annual "Big Apple Writing Workshops! Also, that year, for University City, she was interviewed on video for their history archives! She recounted the stories of their involvement in the neighborhood, the schools, and the goings on of her 4 very different children, with ease and poise.
Our Mom would really brag on each of her children, to each child. She would always stick up for each one and say something nice. There was never any bad guy, just different.
June even did the wonderful illustrations for each chapter of my book, "Thank God I Only Have Two Of These!" in the last year of her life! The first copy came out the following year on her birthday, after she had passed.
Mom was proud of all her children (Fred,Andy,Susan,Wendy), her grandchildren, 5 boys (Todd,Ali,Hassan,Charlie,Daniel) and 1 girl, Emily (they were kindred spirits) and was able to meet her first great grandson,Kyle,(born 2 years before she passed away) courtesy of grandson, Todd & Devon. Our Mom always made each and everyone of them feel special and loved. She just loved being a Grandma!
Our Mom had her own health issues, but never complained. She would often remark how lucky she was! She used to say, "don't waste your time worrying about something till you find out what you need to worry about!" She always looked outside of herself, even when she was very ill, she would ask others, "how are you?" , "so nice of you to call". Our Mom was just a very positive person plus practical.
Our Mom was so excited about Obama becoming President. She wore an "Obama" cap with pride. She had filled out her absentee ballot for him. First thing, after barely recovering from a terrible adverse reaction to her last chemo treatment, she awoke and asked if someone had mailed in her absentee ballot! Later I'm sure, Mom celebrated with President Obama's Mom up in heaven!
During her final days at home, she was surrounded by us kids and family. She actually was able to say good-by to all of us, thank friends that stopped by and even was played "Happy Birthday" on a violin by her friend! Four days after she turned 86, she passed. A magnolia tree in October, in St. Louis, surprisingly had bloomed outside her window. At the funeral service for his Grandma, while referring to his grandparents, Hassan Ghiassi spoke, saying, "every interaction, every kind word, every situation where we choose to do what is right we allow them to live on through us." Later, at the gathering at our brother, Fred and Beverly's house , was a young teenage photo of June, it read:
"If you're looking for me, look in the eyes of my children and grandchildren. That's where you will find me".
Kindly submitted by the family of June P Miller.